Exercise Junkie

I am an exercise junkie. I blame it on my mother. I recently found out that my mom exercised every single day she was pregnant with me. Every Single Day. I think that does something to a kid. Seriously, getting introduced to endorphins that early on. THAT is how you get kids addicted to the good kinds of drugs.

Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, she actually encouraged me to play outside and use my imagination when I was a child! ~gasp~ Outside?!? Playing in the sun, rain and snow. Burning energy and increasing my mental capacities all at the same time. Why, oh why would someone want to encourage me to exercise and make friends? To breath fresh air and observe the wonderment that is the natural world around us? Mom, what were you  thinking? How dare you encourage and teach me to grow up strong and healthy. Oh horror.

On a side note: What if more parents these days encouraged that? Would we be in this obesity epidemic? I know there are a lot of things that factor into where we are as a nation these days, but I strongly believe that healthy habits (like exercise) creates healthier brains which of course helps us make better decisions. So if we could make better choices and teach our young to make better choices, then perhaps we as a society would make better choices?

I am happiest when I'm out in the middle of nowhere. Surrounded by nature and my dogs. Endorphins cruising through my body and giving me a high you can't get anywhere else. Where is your happiest place on earth?

Incredible me

Today is the first day of my classes through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. As I was reading through my materials, watching videos and listening to lectures I found myself overwhelmed with excitement for this upcoming year and the possibilities this training opens up for me. I quickly opened another tab and posted on Facebook about what I was doing. After I pressed "post" I had a sudden sense of dread. A worry about what other people will think when they read my post.

I've always been a very active person. Yoga, bellydancing, horseback riding, hiking, mixed martial arts, karate, modern dance, drama, running, cross country, soccer, basketball, volleyball, backpacking. I love being outside and active. But I've also always loved food and I'm an emotional eater. So despite my high level of activity I've always been heavy. None of that compares to the weight I gained a couple years back and have horribly maintained. With the added weight came a extreme lowering of self confidence. So despite my passion for exercise, health and nutrition. I always feel like such a fraud talking to people about it. I mean surly they're listening to me and then looking at me and thinking "yeah right, like you know anything. If you know so much how come you're such a fat ugly cow?"

So that is what popped into my head the second I posted my plans to become a Certified Holistic Health Coach and better my own health and those of the people around me. "Oh dear God what have I done?!?" The panic set in. So I got up and walked away from the computer. I've been listening to these pre-classes for school and I was choosing to ignore that negative voice that says I can't do something. Haven't people since I was a child told me how stubborn I used to be? How I refused to accept limitations and therefore blew threw the pre conceived limits proving that nothing is impossible. That's right! Just because I look one way on the out side right now doesn't mean that is how I am inside!

That burst of self-confidence didn't last very long. I found myself back at the computer ready to delete my post. But in that little time things had changed. Already numerous friends had liked the post and many people had posted positive uplifting comments. Holy crap! Dose that mean people don't look at me and think all the negative things I always assume they think about me? Mind blowing!

So my thought for the moment. Don't always assume the worse. All you do is convince yourself of limitations that don't really exist. Whats the worse thing that could happen? Can you accept that? Is it something you can live with? Whats the best thing that could happen? How does that make you feel? Then freaking go for it!

Yeah, that's right. I'm going for it. I refuse to accept no for an answer. This is my life and I'm tried of living it a certain way out of fear for what others think. From the sticker on my lap top from college: Those who are different, change the world. Those who are the same, keep it that way.

Be different. Change the world. One person at a time and watch the world ripple.

Being positive

Was it the12 hours of sleep I got? Maybe the days of sunlight that we've had lately. Or possibly the exercise I got yesterday? Maybe the fact that I stayed within my calorie limit yesterday and didn't feel hungry or starved or even had to try hard to do so. Honestly, I don't really know why I feel like this but I'm going to enjoy every minute of it. I feel awesome! Great! Fantastic! Amazing, positive, enthusiastic and just plan good. I feel wonderful today. I don't have that over the top feeling of fantasticness, like nothing can go wrong. I just feel really good. I know things aren't perfect, but that's ok. I'm about to take my break and go walk the track at work for 15 minutes. Which is known to be painful for me. But within 15-30 minutes afterwards, I feel fine, good, great. And one day, one day I won't even be in pain or tired after a 15 minute walk. One day it'll be like nothing. It'll be the short walk that it is and I'll be wishing I could do more.

I live in one of the most beautiful places on earth. But I'm not going to live here forever. I'm tired of taking it for granted. This summer, this next year. I'm going to start getting out there and enjoying what this place has to offer. I'm going to stop taking it for granted and ignoring it because I've seen it every day for the last 20 years. I'm going to go out and enjoy it, relish in it. I'm going to really take a look at the beauty of the world around me.

Stupid Stairs

I've been having a good morning. Despite my youngest becoming rather stuck to my side since my husband boarded the plane this morning for another week long drill. My youngest will be 2 in May. Hes the cutest little fuzz ball that you've ever seen. He's a dog by the way. He was being so spastic and needy this morning I decided to take him to work with my when I finally headed out the door at noon. The weather has been rather erratic lately but I figured with his thick almost husky coat, he should be fine. Plus this way he gets a short walk during the middle of the day!

So I'm feeling pretty good. I took my husband to the airport early this morning. Came home and re-familiarized myself with where the swords and guns are in the house, you know, safety first :) Got dressed, made the good chai tea with lots of sugar, extra strong and some french vanilla creamer. It's awesome. I got to talk to my husband on the drive to work. I found out that my nature's box that I paid for on the 1st and they finally shipped on the 8th is FINALLY in town. So it should be dropped off either today or tomorrow. It sucks that it takes almost a month after ordering to get to Juneau. Every time so far it gets as far as Federal Way Washington and then sits there for a week or two before it leaves for Alaska. Stupid USPS.

So I park all the way across the parking lot. Not that its a very big parking lot and not just because little Ares will guard my car against anyone who gets near it but also for the little bit of extra walk that I could get in. I'm feeling on a health kick today. I'm going to get exercise and feel good about it. I'm getting rid of this extra weight! So in the spirited frame of mind I'm in I decided to take the stairs instead of the elevator. Its not like it's a lot of extra work but I'm not carrying my lap top and all that extra weight in my bag today and I was feeling spunky so up the 3 flights of stairs I went.

It's been a half hour and I'm only now feeling like I can settle down and really get back to work. I always get a little winded going up the stairs. My legs ache and I feel out of breath but today with my heart pounding and I felt to hot and a little sweaty after I sat down at my desk. Lame, super lame. Now, no matter how I feel that day I'm going to walk up those stupid stairs. Everywhere I go, I'm taking the stupid stairs. Until I nolonger feel winded just from walking up the stupid stairs. Stupid stairs.

Self Magazine Review

I love Sparkpeople.com. I can't not love it. Although I know people can find it overwhelming and confusing when first joining it. The site is absolutely amazing. Giving you resources and support on your health journey. It's not like any other free wight loss website out there. I know, I've joined dozens of them. But sparkpeople isn't just about weight loss. It's about getting healthy. They have a lot of resources from support groups to an online health coach. They even have stuff about getting financially healthy as well. This site is great for everyone. Lose weight, gain bulk, tone up, healthier eating, vegan diets, all sorts of stuff. The first year I got on them I didn't really use it because of a lot of reasons. Partly I couldn't figure out how to use it and partly because my life went to hell in a hand basket 2 months later. But I'm not really here to talk so much about sparkpeople as something else.

Sparkpeople has this great person on their staff who goes by "Coach Nicole" shes inspirational and amazing. She talks about finding your healthy weight and not trying to force yourself down to unhealthy images we see on tv and in magazines. This summer she got the opportunity to work with SELF magazine. It was great. She wrote about the experience and the cloths and the people she worked with. But as she was talking about it, there was things posted on sparkpeople about how she was going to be in the September Issue. It was July and she was so excited and positive about things and I was in such need for some extra boosts of positivity and health that I decided to sign up for the Magazine. It was like $12 for a year! So in July I signed up for it. And Paid for a full year subscription by internet. Of course they always say expect 6-8 weeks for the first edition to reach you. In August I decided to subscribe to Yoga Journal and Vegetarian Times. All in my pursuit for a happier, healthier, better future.

The first week in September I got both Yoga Journal and Vegetarian Times in the mail. I decided to paitently wait for my SELF magazine while I poored through those other two and started incorporating things into my life. By the end of the first week in October I still hadn't recieved an issue of SELF. I had even ran around town looking for a September issue in September because I didn't want to miss out on the one with Coach Nicole in it. I couldn't find a single place that had any copies. That was in September. I figured that when I finally got my copy in the mail I could give the extra copy away to someone else who might be interested.

Stores are supposed to switch over to the next issues of magazines the last week of the month before. So October issues went out between the 20th and 25th of September. Not that I could find any of those ones in town. The whole point of signing up was to get September's issue with Coach Nicole. By the end of the first week in October I had yet to recieve a single issue of SELF magazine. I got online and checked my account. They weren't going to send me a September issue. They were starting my subscription in October. Even though I had signed up and paid in July. Ok whatever, I figured I would see what they were like anyways. But I had already begun to recieve weekly requests to renew my subscription in my email and my mailbox. I hadn't even gotten and SINGLE issue yet and they were bugging me to renew already! I sent an email to their customer service explaining that I had yet to recieve a single issue and the first week of October was almost over. I of course got the email saying they recieved my email and a customer service person would be contacting me shortly. A WEEK later they emailed me and all the person said was that at the time of my email the magazine wasn't considered late yet. That was it. How lame is that?

So I waited and by the last week of October I had STILL not received October's issue. I sent another email explaining that. All I got in responce was the automated email saying someone would be in touch with me shortly. It's December 19th. No one EVER got in touch with me. No email, no phone call. I finally recieved my October issue on the last saturday of the month. Over a week since the stores would have pulled the October issue off the shelves. November...same thing happened. got my November issue the last weekend of the month. Ever other magazine subcription I've gotten in my life have all come within the flast week of the month prior or the first few days of that month. I have had a LOT of magazine subscriptions over the years. Until recently I regularly subscribed to a large number of horse magazines. I used to subscribe to a number of fitness and health magazines as well. I have never had such poor service.

I will not be renewing my subscription to them. Their service sucks and their magazine is over 75% advertisements. Whats really sad is that this put a damper on my enthusiasm about sparkpeople and coach nicole. But it wasn't only a small damper. No one is perfect. And for every person that complains theres like 10 people who love it. But I wont have anything to do with them ever again. It was only a $12 mistake, but it's still a total bummer.

I continue to receive weekly emails and letters urging me to renew and sign up a friend. I don't think there is anyone I dislike enough to sign them up free or for a small price.

The Year of the Core

I was just reading an interesting email through About.com on Yoga. I subscribe to some of their email newsletters. The one on Yoga is written by Ann Pizer (http://yoga.about.com/bio/Ann-Pizer-12794.htm?nl=1) and it always has good information. For those of you who don't know. About.com has a number of free newsletters and e-courses that you can have delivered directly to your inbox and you can always opt out of them at any time. I get a number of them including trying to learn French in preparation for talking French once I head back to college.

So in this article she talked about all this negative stuff that happened concerning Yoga in the last year and how she chooses not to think about that but to think about the positive aspects. Which, honestly, is something I've struggled with in the last couple years. Its something a lot of people struggle with but is much needed for all of us.  The need to focus on more positive then negative. Which is not the point of this but really people. We have so much negativity in our lives. We really should try to focus more on the positive. You can see the negative, you can acknowledge it, but we shouldn't dwell in it. We just bring our own lives down. So Ann is looking back on the last year and calling it the year of the core. If you read the information she provides you can see how its true. However if you're anything like me you probably haven't been focusing on your core muscles this last year. And lets face it people.

Core is where it's all at. Balance, life, it all revolves around your core. Your core muscles (the abs and lower back) are the foundation for everything we do. Every day we use our core muscles continuously. I'm learning more and more about how they play a major part in every single thing we do. Everything. I'm serious. Stop looking at me like that :) no really, look it up. Your core muscles connect to everything. They're responcible for everything. And when they're weak, we suffer. We have problems. So while everything is connected I was thinking about what she was saying about last year being the year of the core. But I was thinking I will make this next year the year of the core for me.

Let me explain. While I'm starting to do Yoga again and practicing bellydancing. While I'm sitting at my desk or walking my dogs. Every thing I do brings those core muscles into use. I don't know about you but let me tell you something. My core muscles are WEAK. This year I will once again try to focus more on myself. And I will do better then I did last year. While working through my health and fitness I'm going to do some major focusing on my core muscles. With everything connected through them, I think this is a very important thing to focus on. Core is everything. So lets make this next year the year of the core. Utilize the resources that were created last year to make a better, stronger next year.

Salvation Army vs. Saint Vincent De Pauls

When I was growing up we used to shop at Salvation Army all the time. Occasionally we used to stop by the Saint Vincent De Pauls. These are both local thrift stores. Salvation Army had a large store full of stuff. Usually things that fell out of fasion years ago but when you don't have much money you get what you can, where you can. It was always dusty and dirty and kind of moldy smelling but the people at the front counter were always friendly if seemingly rather tired and always busy. The place was always stuffed to the walls and people always told me it was a good idea to shop there because the proceeds go to help those less fortunate. We always donated our little worn clothing that no longer fit to them.

We didn't do to much shopping at Saint Vincents. Their store was smaller and occasionally you would find a good deal but mostly it wasn't that great. I don't remember donating to them.

About 10 years ago I did some volunteer work and it has changed the choices I make. I spent a couple days at the Salvation Army. It was boring and eye opening. They had stuff in back stock waiting to go out on the floor, not much of it. But they were getting trash bags full of new and nice clothing every day. What did they have me do with it? Throw it in the big dumpster. Not even look at it, just throw it away. I was told "we have enough stuff right now so just throw away whatever we get in" That's what I did for a couple days. Just throw away item after item of usable clothing, shoes, bedding, everything. I was mortified. I was also bored because unless someone was dropping something off, that just got thrown away, I had nothing to do. They didn't give me anything to do but sit in the back room and occasionally throw things away.

After a few days of that I went to help out at Saint Vincent De Pauls. What a difference. Did you know that lost and found from the airport that never gets picked up, gets dropped off there? So do a number of other local organizations. Drop off stuff there I mean. Yet there store is not very big. So what happens to all that stuff? The nice lady showing me around showed me this room. It was filled with boxes. Floor to ceiling, wall to wall. Each box was neatly packed and labeled. Then a couple times a year a container from one of the shipping places stops by and fills it up. They ship it off to rural villages, 3rd world countries and people in need around the globe. The only things thrown away were unsalvagable things. Things with huge rips and stains.

I ended up volunteering there for a while past the hours I needed. They were always busy and always in need of help sorting, cleaning and boxing things. I don't know how other places run their businesses. But last night I was reading an article in SELF magazine that talked about different cancer charities and research institutes and where the money actually goes. It's always good to know what happens to the stuff and/or money that you donate. Do your research before donating. It doesn't help your cause if you're donating to a place that uses the money for personal gains like salaries and bonuses.

Its like how I found out that the local PetCo solicits monetary donations for our local shelter The Gastineau Humane Society. Yet less then 15% of what they collect actually goes to the shelter. Yet our local shelter which depends on donations in order to provide things like food and medical needs for the homeless animals of Juneau shows an 50-80% drop in donations since PetCo opened. But thats a topic for a different blog.